carver comes alive!

carver loves the snow. I keep trying to take pictures but apparently all aa batteries in my house are spent. anyway, carver had a good walk today after a terrible, scary night. but I am getting ahead of myself. I got home about 3 yesterday, the snow storm just moving out after leaving a solid 10 inches of snow on the ground. carver and I immedietley headed outside. the new normal being that carver only goes into the yard to relieve himself, and then back up the stairs, I was shocked to see carver head right into the yard. we walked to the back fence and back, lay in the tallest snowbank he could find, did some sniffing of a neighborhood dog. when it was time to go in, we headed towards the steps-but instead of going up, carver headed down the shoveled side walk. we walked all the way down the street, turned onto parkwood terrance, and made it to the steps of our neighbor mary & al's house. I think he would have kept going, but I turned him around, knowing we we re getting close to carver's acupuncture appointment.

janice came at 530. she put in over 30 needles, working the whole spine, both hind legs, including the ankles, then back to do the lumbar spine again. carver comfortably turned over a couple of times, and seemed alert and in good spirits. she said he seemed better than the last time she came, which was probably 2 1/2 weeks ago. she also confirmed the fact that we are in "the next level", or something like that. closer to his death. it is something I have acknowledged to myself, but there is something about hearing it from someone else that really brings it home. janice just lost her own 14 year old dog. she has been such a good support for both carver and me.

after the appointment, carver wanted to go outside. he seemed anxious, panting . carver has had diarrhea for a couple of days now, and I figured he needed to go again. he walked to the back of the yard, and squatted. I decided to try & move his tail out of the way-he had been soiling himself ever since this started, and I thought we could try to avoid it. I moved his tail up about 1/2 and inch, and he screamed in pain, leaping away from me and laying in the snow. I was in a panic, shocked and left feeling awful and frightened. I took him back in, but he continued to pant and cry, shaking so hard sometimes his teeth chattered. I felt overwhelmed with guilt and fear that I had made his pain peremenently worse. we immedietly gave him his next dose of tramadol and tried to calm him down. a heating pad on his lower back, he finally fell into a fretful sleep. carver continued to have diahrrea, and we went out several times during the night, about every two hours, until we both finally fell into a deep sleep in the living room around 330 a.m.

I took carver out around 8 this morning before I headed to work. still sick, he did what he needed to then cried for me to help him right up the stairs. I left for work feeling sad and nervous.

when I came home carver was sound asleep. I fed him some yogurt while he was still laying down, and gave him his afternoon meds. he drifted off again. I could stand it for about 30 minutes, but then I started to worry again. what if he was in so much pain all he could do was sleep? I poked him until he woke up, roused him with rice in his kibble bowl, then shook his jacket until he stood up. we begun the trip in the yard, where he walked to the back yard again. he spent some time in the snow, sniffing the air. but then, jsut like yesterday, he was on the move! we made it almost to the jamaica way and back. carver's back legs look very weak, but that does not stop him from walking in the deepest snow he can find! he really seemed to enjoy his time outside. we were out for about 45 minutes, him running down the shoveled path, then tossing himself in the snow. he still seems a bit sick, but his change in diet will hopefully do the trick. I am just grateful he seems to not be in pain, that I didn't break some part of him last night, and that he can still enjoy himself out in the world. my attitude towards the snow has totally changed!